Monday, October 28, 2013

Dedicating Orctober to the ladies…




 I just finished painting up a few of the old female Orcs from the villagers range and it got me thinking about how neglected Orc women folk have become in the past 15-20 years. There even seems to be the silly notion that Orc females don’t exist which is a bunch of malarkey. But for all the modern fluff's attempt to forget about Orc woman, once their caste in lead you can't erase them.

So here’s a few of my Orc ladies I’ve managed to assemble.


“Now Sista, you aint gonna make no husband outta dat Bo’ by batting him on the bean with that rolleen-peen…  that comes later.”
  -Old Orc matron to the young perspective Orc matron.




I suspect only very old Orcs ever find the urge to settle down and find a wife and the venture is usual short lived.  Gork and Mork only know the nuances of Orc courtship but I’m sure a fair few of the Boys don’t survive the endeavor.  
Although most Orcs are generally idlers and loafers, the cantankerous old gals incessant berating and a dozen or so dirty screaming whelps around the hut is usually enough for the old Bo’ to find the nearest waaagh (or start one) to escape the humdrum of domestic life.

Ol’ Bo Porgo Bucktooth dusted off his old crossbow and slipped out the front door mumbling something about hearing stunties in the garden.  He was never seen around this little village again.



 Here we have Olgra-go-Bash bringing home the bacon so to speak.  Probably going to whip up some Hair-foot-hoagies or Samwise Sammies’.


Can Orc women join in the fighting with the rest of the Boys?  I don’t see why not so long as she has a good right hook and can hold her own. 

(left)Everybody knew Dorra Skullcrusher had already maimed at least half a dozen luckless Bo’s back in her village. So nobody really complained when she attached herself to Boss Gorgat’s raiding party.  (right) Bertta Crotchity had reared dozens of whelps in her day. “fightin’ the waaagh was easier then fixin’ breakfast.”.



The assembled ladies





I saw six Bo’s kicking and punching me mudder-in-law the udder day.  Me gobo sez to me ‘Ain’t ya gonna help?’ I sez’ ‘Nah, six should be enough’
 -Warboss Arrkee Bunkhead